Fluid/Text
= Day Forty-Four = Perhaps it was because there was some sort of new malfunction in the ship's systems. Perhaps it was because the TARDIS, on some level, knew it probably shouldn't materialize here. Perhaps it was a combination of the two. But for whatever reason, a moment after materialization, the TARDIS fell. Gravity went a bit wibbly, and when the TARDIS finally landed with a sickening squelching sound the floor was not quite level. "That's...that's a different landing from usual," said Zinnia. "That probably means it's a different place outside than usual. Not a place we're meant to be," the Doctor speculated. "Who's up for having a look?" "As long as its not all acid or something," said Zinnia. "That only happened twice. In this face," the Doctor reassured her. Ellie trudged out in her pyjamas. "What's with the bumpy landing?" "The TARDIS seems to have materialized several miles above our ultimate stopping point," the Doctor said. "That was a several mile drop?" asked Zinnia. "Geez." "Anyone want to have a look at where we crashed? See what the fuss is about?" asked the Doctor. "Alright!" said Zinnia. Ellie yawned. "Sorry I'm getting up so late, I stayed up a bit late in the library. Do you think I can get a cup of tea before we do the whole adventuring thing today?" "Maybe you could get it to go? We may have landed on something important to someone. Actually, the scanner might tell us something about that." The Doctor strode over to the scanner and had a look. Ellie headed off to the kitchen. Zinnia walked up to the scanner too. "Does it say anything about the kind of environment we'll be going out into?" The TARDIS didn't say what, if anything, they'd landed on, but it was giving the particulars of what it had landed in. The chemical was called telket, and was normally highly toxic. In this case, however, it'd been treated with some sort of neutralizing agent that should make walking around in it, if not safe, than at least far less deadly than usual. "Well, it's not acid," the Doctor said. Ellie came back with a flask and a beach towel. "Has the TARDIS confused the bathroom with the kitchen again? Because I found these all over the place." "That's a glitch in the theme," the Doctor said. "Happens sometimes. You should see when the interiors are misconfigured to set an avalanche of sweets behind every closet door." "Depending on how literally you mean avalanche, that sounds nice," said Zinnia. The TARDIS gave a little lurch. "Are we ready then?" the Doctor asked. "I'm ready." Zinnia turned to Ellie. "Are you going to make it a pajama day today?" Ellie shrugged. "I guess? I mean, what's the temperature and weather like out there?" The scanner gives some climate readout--high humidity, and about 32ºC (90ºF) and dropping. "I thought you'd just decided on a coordinated silk suit today," remarked the Doctor. "It's mildly toxic out, but we should be fine for brief exposures. Hot and muggy, but cooling down." "Well, no time like the now." Zinnia opened the doors of the TARDIS. Ellie shrugged. "Can't be more toxic than Gramps' litter box" she mumbled under her breath as she exited, towel and flask in hand. It was difficult to tell whether the TARDIS had dropped at an odd angle or if the ground was simply sloped. Either way, stepping out would mean being stepping up to your ankles in sludge at the absolute best. Overhead, the roof of a cavern loomed, dripping ever so slightly. "I think...I'm going to grab some rubbers for protection." Zinnia pops back into the TARDIS and shortly returns wearing boots made for her crazy bird feet. Ellie also grabbed a pair of boots. "It looks like we were partly phased as we fell. It could have been worse." At that moment, a beam of light engulfed the TARDIS, and it began to levitate. It hovered in the air for a bit, cockeyed and with the doors still hanging open, before beginning to bob and haphazardly navigate itself forwards. "Follow that tractor beam?" the Doctor asked. The TARDIS wasn't giving the group much of a choice, puttering along at a decent rate and gradually putting distance between itself and its occupants. Zinnia trudged the yuck trying to keep up with the TARDIS or even the others. Ellie sipped her tea as she walked, trying not to think about her dry-cleaning bill. The cavern began to get narrower, the walls and ceiling coming together as they walked. Even the ground was now on an upward incline, with the sludge slowly falling away and revealing a squishy, yellowish floor beneath. The Doctor was fairly certain there was a Gallifreyian treatment that would keep unwanted substances off of shoes and clothing, but it appeared his current wardrobe hadn't had it. Zinnia lagged a bit behind but managed to keep up, although with a small amount of huffery and puffery. Ellie was glad she'd gotten a dimensionally transcendental flask. "I'm not sure which to feel worse for. Though I'm leaning toward the cavern since it could come down on us if it's too badly mistreated," the Doctor mused aloud. "Sorry dear." The TARDIS repaid him for his misplaced sympathy by having the apparent tractor beam collapse around her and begin to slide on her backside towards her husband. "Why do we always have to be caught in the middle of your marital troubles again?" Ellie asked. The Doctor braced himself to try to catch and slow her against the slippery muck as best he could, before she built up too much speed. Thankfully, the terrain was lumpy as well as uneven, and he managed to find enough decent footholds to slow it down--but not to keep it from pushing himself and his companions back into the main body of the cavern. Fluid could be seen dripping from cracks in the upward incline. "Yech!" exclaimed Zinnia. "But at least the TARDIS didn't get away from us. "What was trying to take her? Tractor beams seem misplaced in slime caves." "Well if she's safe here, we could go check that out," the Doctor suggested. "Sounds good to me," said Ellie. "Need any help setting her down?" Ellie asked, bracing herself against the sliding TARDIS. The dripping from the ceiling and walls began to become more pronounced and an odd hissing sound could be heard. Zinnia leaned her shoulder against the TARDIS, trying to help. "I think the ceiling is leaking and hissing and I'm concerned with the overall stability of it!" "We're near the low point, she should be settling soon," the Doctor said. He took a hand away from the TARDIS to reach for the Sonic to scan for the source of the hissing. "It turns out that hissing is the sound of this cave getting more lethal. If we want to investigate, we should probably put on isolation suits. And if that's the case, we should probably turn her to a side where we can get at the door." As soon as the tardis hit the low point so she would stop sliding, Zinnia helped to try and turn her over. Ellie grabbed a side and tried to help turn it as well. Unfortunately, the TARDIS continued sliding off the incline and into the main body, where it leveled out and began to float. "Well this should actually help." The Doctor waded in tentatively and attempted to roll the TARDIS door-side up. He felt a mild tingling on the edge of his ankles, and tried to speed up the rolling process. The ground was also very wet, so there wasn't much to work with in the way of footing. He'd manage to tip it slightly, and tried to hurry things along with Zinnia and Ellie's help. "Careful, this stuff is definitely not good for the skin. But the quicker we get this done the quicker we can get it off," the Doctor said. With a bit of a push, the TARDIS would turn onto another side, and the TARDIS entrance would be facing them. They could crawl in, but it'd require kneeling into the muck. "Just once more," the Doctor instructed. "Right," Ellie acknowledged, as she helped turn it one more time. The crew's legs would begin to itch as they pushed again. Ellie's shadow tried to assist as much as it could discretely. That extra bit made quite the difference, and the TARDIS turned far quicker this time, with its entrance now rightside up. The goop that had leaked in the open doors splatted across the righthand wall of the console room. "Climb in, quickly," the Doctor instructed. "Brace yourselves in case the local gravity is off." Ellie jumped into the TARDIS while he was speaking, landing on the wall for a moment before quickly rolling leftwards onto the floor. "Ow." Zinnia also jumped in. Forewarned by Ellie, she flapped to slow her fall a little. The Doctor sat on the doorframe out of the goop, waiting for the area around the landing wall to clear. "We should all go get this stuff showered off." "On it." Ellie started towards the TARDIS bathroom, towel in hand. Zinnia also went to find someway to wash off the acidic goop. The Doctor jumped in. On landing, he clicked his fingers to close the doors, then headed off to decon himself. All of them manage to find bathing areas with relative ease. The TARDIS has put some extra effort into making sure no one stumbles into, say, the kitchen while looking for a way to clean dangerous toxins off themselves. The Doctor returned to the console room in an isolation suit, waiting for the others. Zinnia was the first to arrive. The Doctor set some controls to dampen any future attempts at tractoring the TARDIS. "Everyone ready again?" = Day Forty-Five = "No sense counting the clouds when there are winds to catch," Zinnia replied. "You guys still in here?" Ellie asked, poking her head back in the door in her isolation suit. "Ah." The Doctor made the tricky change between the local gravity and the gravity outside. Better than grappling out though. "Whoa!" Ellie exclaimed as she fell back out of the TARDIS. "I'm okay!" Indeed she would be, though her suit was dripping in fluids. Not harmful, not with the isolation suit, but probably a bit clingy and uncomfortable. "So! We ready yet?" Ellie called. "As I'll ever be," Zinnia replied. "Then off we go," the Doctor said. Zinnia's boots made squishing sounds as they hit the bottom of the cave. "I've had dreams like this. Uh, crawling through a jelly sewer to rob the cookie bank. Sweet dreams, y'know?" "Time travel's always been possible in dreams," Ellie suggested. "Maybe you predicted this. Like Van Gogh or somebody." "Van who?" Zinnia asked. "Earth painter, the Doctor replied. "Tuned into the world on an entirely different level, and put that on canvas." "Ah, sorry," said Zinnia. "Earth culture never really penetrated beyond the kitsch. Although there was quite a fashion for tye-dye when I was growing up." "At least this cave isn't alive, probably," said the Doctor. "I've done too much stomping around inside slimy living things." At that moment, light began to stream into the cavern from the ceiling. A large, silver triangle protruded from it, moving along and creating a large crack up above. "Okay, that's bad, right?" Zinnia asked. The metal implement slid back into the ceiling as long, rubbery appendages took their place, pulling the crevice open. "Moving faster would probably be advisable," responded the Doctor. Zinnia followed that advice. Ellie followed suit. One set of appendages began moving further in, revealing themselves to be a set of three fingers on the edge of a rubbery, blue hand. The hand moved in, followed closely by the arm behind it, and began reaching for the TARDIS. "Wat," said Ellie. "Uh, does this crack top ten weirdest things that you've seen?" Zinnia asked. "Giant hand, cracking open a cave ceiling and stealing the TARDIS? Top 50." the Doctor replied. Zinnia chuckled. The hand grabbed the TARDIS and began to lift it up, until both had exited the cave. Booming, muffled voices could be heard from the other side of the ceiling: "I don't know what it is, but it's not naturally occurring. He said he hadn't eaten anything recently?" "Yes, that's right. Just suddenly began having pains in his cirtsag." The Doctor waved the screwdriver at the occurrence in an attempt to do... something. "I think...the cave was alive probably," Zinnia said. "It would appear so. Hello?! Surgeons?!" The Doctor didn't expect to be heard, but it was worth a try. The voices continued. "Could it have been materialized in there? Maybe it's part of some sort of assassination attempt." "It would take one hell of a targeting system. I'll go report it. You run a scan, see if there's anything else in there that shouldn't be, then seal him up." "Talking to them becomes a less attractive proposition," said the Doctor. "So how do we avoid this scan then?" Ellie asked. At that moment, some beeping noises could be heard as a wave of green light passed over them. "We don't?" the Doctor said. The green light stopped. "Holy crap. Better be careful with this. Where'd I put the medical tractor?" "Can we sonic something?" Ellie asked. "Anything?" "Could possibly short it out or introduce interference or something, then run off and find our own way out," the Doctor replied. "Take our chances in an alien digestive system, or take our chances with the folks who have our ride and think we might be assassins." "I want this adventure to be over," said Ellie. "So we can never speak of this again." She stopped and thought. "Can't you make a homing device out of a whistle?" "Have you got one?" the Doctor asked. "We'll need the TARDIS back eventually and I don't fancy trying the intestinal flume ride," said Zinnia. The booming voice came again. "Ah, there it is. Good thing, too. I leave you open much longer and your stomach'll overoxygenate, and I don't want to be the man who killed the leader of the free world." "Oh god we're in a giant president," said Zinnia. "Or we're very small." Doctor reached out for Ellie and Zinnia. "Hold on to each other, don't get separated." Ellie grabbed onto Zinnia and the Doctor. "Nobody left the door open in flight, right?" the Doctor asked. A bright light engulfed them, and they began to be lifted up out of what was now more clearly some sort of internal organ. = Day Forty-Six = "Doesn't the TARDIS have a setting to not land inside of someone?" Zinnia asked. "I'm getting shivers just thinking about that now." "She also has settings to not break into other universes or collide with herself," said the Doctor. " But it happens." "This is the worst adventure," said Ellie. "Ever." "Even worse than we got stuck in the universe's longest queue for a week?" asked Zinnia. As they were lifted out they could see, faintly, through the light, the face of the surgeon--fairly reptilian, with lavender scales and a frill around the neck. And he, too, appeared to be examining them, with the four grey eyes aligned in a diamond about his forehead. Slowly, he swiveled the beam, and dropped the three onto a metal pan on a nearby table. Zinnia laughed nervously. "I was voted 'most likely to be a foreign contaminant' in school. I thought it was just a bit of cruelty at the time." "Hello, I don't suppose you can hear us up there?" the Doctor called. The tractor beam switched off, leaving the three face to face with the surgeon. His eyes began to swivel oddly in their sockets. "Hm. Oddly complex for life forms of your size. Presence of artificial skins implies sapience, at least, that or some very bizarre dermal functions. DEFINITELY not naturally occurring. So the question is how did you get in there?" "Navigational fault, I assume. Also probably scale control fault," the Doctor replied. "I'm usually three and a quarter varics tall!" Zinnia said. The surgeon cocked his head. "Are you...speaking? Speaking treian?" His eyes drifted apart slightly. "Right then. I'm going to go fetch a microphone. You three, if you can understand me, stay put." The surgeon rushed out of the room. "I guess...we're going to be a marvel of science," said Zinnia. The TARDIS could be spotted on another table across the room. "Why couldn't it be in the decontamination tray with us?" Ellie asked. "Already been decontaminated? Moved to 'evidence' tray?" the Doctor speculated. A loud hissing sound could be heard as steam began to emanate from the surgical hole in the large, sedated man to their left. "I have a sneaking suspicion that's not normal," said the Doctor. As if to confirm this suspicion, the large medical computer to the man's left began to make a loud, repetitive beeping sound. Within seconds, a thunder of footsteps could be heard approaching the room. "Oh god the doctor left without closing the president up? That's...probably malpractice," Zinnia remarked. "We distracted him. Though I did think he'd be back by now," the Doctor said. Within moments, three doctors--one of whom had a voice the group might find familiar--had rushed into the room and immediately began examining the body. After a few frenzied moments of passing around equipment and taking readings the room fell still. One of the doctors called it. "Emperor Odg'n Ro is dead. Twenty-five hundred hours." "Oh this is not going to end well." Zinnia remarked. Immediately the three doctors turned to face the group. "What are those things?" "Did they just speak?" "I knew it!" cried the one with the familiar voice. "Assassins!" "We're not the ones that left the emperor while he had a hole in his chest," Ellie pointed out. The original surgeon rushed back in carrying a megaphone. "Ohgodohgodohgodohgod--" he stopped, panting, and looked up to see the doctors crowding around the dead emperor. His eyes slid downwards. "I can explain. It's not my fault. These creatures--" "What the hell is wrong with you two? Even if they did somehow slip into the Emperor's body to kill him, they couldn't have forced Dr. Bihr to leave the room while the Emperor's cirtsag hanging open," said one of them. Xe paused. "Could they?" "I would think assassins with the power to force a surgeon to go get something wouldn't have a need for internal sabot--" the Doctor started, but the other doctor had pointed this out for him. "Ah." "I'm surprised that a patient of such important only had one doctor in the room. This hospital needs to work on its standards," Zinnia remarked. "Yes they could!" stammered Dr. Bihr. "They teleported inside my mind and...melded with it, somehow. Controlled it. I could...see their thoughts, as they influenced mine. Their plan was...to get themselves extracted...and distract us long enough for the Emperor to technically die of natural causes." He cleared his throat and straightened his jacket. "Science be damned, we need to destroy them immediately." "No no, that doesn't make sense! If we can mere with minds than why aren't we doing it now? If we can teleport why would we hang around in a tray?" Zinnia protested. "You'd think an Emperor's surgeon would know the difference between 'natural causes' and 'criminal malpractice'," the Doctor muttered. The other two scientists stared at him as the one with the familiar voice came to his side. "Makes sense to me. Get the medical disposal unit fired up." "My god," said the fourth, who thus far hadn't said anything. "You two are INSANE." "Here's an idea, let the shrunken accused tell the truth, and decide who's telling a pathetic lie," the Doctor suggested. The fourth doctor continued. "I mean, look at these things. They're at best six feet high. I doubt they're capable of cognizant thought, let alone controlling someone else's mind. The simple explanation is that the Emperor took a secret trip off-world, picked up some sort of bug, and then you committed malpractice like the shitty excuse for a surgeon you've always been." "Nevermind on the shrunken, then," Ellie remarked. "Ah good, no scale issues to resolve," the Doctor said. "Also, how do they know what a foot is? Or a second? If it's the TARDIS, why isn't it just letting them understand us?" Ellie asked. "It's translation, not amplification," the Doctor replied. The fourth picked up the tractor and once again lifted the group. "I'm taking these to the bio lab for study. And you, Dr. Bihr, no longer have your great-uncle to protect you. In fact, if anyone had something to gain from an assassination attempt...well, I suggest you pack your locker, sit tight, and pray the authorities are merciful." "You don't want to study the box too or anything?" the Doctor asked. The third doctor grabbed the TARDIS and handed it over to the fourth. "Thank you, Dr. Uytr. Do see that these two make it to the authorities. Bihr, Gatred--it hasn't been pleasant." And with that the doctor left the operating room and began to walk the four down the hall. The doctor walked in silence before finally coming to the bio lab door. Xe flicked on the lights and opened up four large glass tanks, dropping the TARDIS, Ellie, Zinnia, and the Doctor each into their own, closing each lid securely, and leaving. After some time, Zinnia says "Anyone want to play charades?" Ellie couldn't hear her, because sealed glass tank. "Pictionary maybe?" Zinnia sighed and sat down. "Maybe try shouting?!" the Doctor suggested. "Hello!" Zinnia responded. "I had some very shouty friends for a while! They'd love this!" the Doctor called. "Well actually they wouldn't, but you get my meaning!" Ellie asked the Doctor, in universal sign language, "Can me or Zinnia shatter this glass with our voices?" Ellie paused, then facepalmed, then asked, "or using the bloody Sonic?" "You know, I've broken some glass with my voice in my time. Haven't practiced in a few centuries. Or the sonic, yes." The Doctor activated the sonic screwdriver, modulating the frequency to find the glass's resonance. It shattered, bringing a good deal of broken glass down on top of him and leaving him with a fairly troubling amount of large cuts across his body, many of which began to bleed. "Are you okay?" Zinnia asked. "Probably. Wouldn't recommend it though," the Doctor replied. "Maybe you can open the lids now?" Ellie asked. "If we escape, are we going to implicate ourselves and let whatshisface off the hook?" Zinnia asked. "Better question: Do we care?" Ellie replied. "We could get to the TARDIS and use her systems to amplify our voices, then wait and give our story," the Doctor suggested. Ellie put her head down and covered herself with her arms. "Just shatter the next one, climbing would be too difficult," she told the Doctor. The Doctor shattered the case holding the TARDIS. "What about us?!" Ellie asked. "Should I rain glass shards on you, or try to pick you up with the TARDIS?" the Doctor asked. "You can barely drive that thing! I'll take my chances!" Ellie said. "I'll chance the TARDIS over glass shards personally," Zinnia opined. The Doctor raised the screwdriver. "Then are you ready?" Ellie ducked her head down and covered herself with her arms. The Doctor shattered her box. She, too, would now have multiple shards of glass lodged in her and any number of bleeding cuts. Ellie groaned. She carefully started walking to the TARDIS. "If anyone needs me I'll be in the med bay." "I still think the TARDIS was the better idea." The Doctor went to the TARDIS himself. "Zinnia, you still want to try it that way?" "Yes, I'm not fond of multiple impalement," Zinnia said. The Doctor went to the controls and used visual targeting to lock onto Zinnia's exact location and materialize around her. This worked. The Doctor returned the TARDIS to its previous location and set to work tying the phone handset into something that could function as a loudspeaker. "Welcome aboard, by the way. Ellie might need help in the medbay." "I'll go check on her." Zinnia left the console room for the medbay. The Doctor tested the loudspeaker system. "Check, check, Brobdingnangian Biscuit tins." The sound was projected loud and clear into the room. The Doctor drew the handset to the door and stood to wait. It would be a long wait. Most of the relevant parties were, after all, under investigation. After some time, however, two rather imposing members of this race wearing full-body armor knocked the door open and approached the TARDIS. "This was the foreign contaminent? It looks like someone shrunk my kid's lunch box," one said. "Hello there. Can I tell our side of the story now?" the Doctor asked. The two jumped back. "Aporgap! It speaks!" cried one of them. "We've been trying to talk for a while now, but we were too small for you folks to hear," the Doctor explained. "What...what are you?" asked another. It was reaching for its sidearm. "Travellers. Had a navigational fault and unfortunately ended up inside your emperor. When your surgeon pulled us out he was rather distracted by us, and we were rather distracted by trying to talk to him, and everyone kind of forgot about closing him up. Then Bihr came up with some cockamamie nonsense about us using mind control," the Doctor said. "Sorry about the mess in here, and very sorry about the Emperor." "Yes, we've heard Odg'n Bihr's side of the story. We honestly thought he and the rest had made you up to cover his tracks," said the first authority figure. The other one scowled. "You'd better be sorry. You'd be sick not to be." "As far as we know, he didn't plan anything. He's just a bad surgeon and a bad liar," the Doctor responded. "It doesn't matter what he did or didn't plan," the second one said. "He let the Emperor die, and since the new laws hadn't come into effect yet, every doctor responsible for his personal care is going to be facing life imprisonment." "He tried to have worse done to us, so I don't feel too sorry for him. Though the others probably," said the Doctor. "You should feel sorry for this entire nation," it continued. "You have no idea the chain of events you've triggered." "Again, total accident," said the Doctor. = Day Forty-Seven = "Right then. We're going to have to take you in for interogation, and when that's done...well, the usual penal sentence will probably be waved in favor of having the lot of you sent back here to be studied." The other one squinted a bit. "Shouldn't you all be in containment units?" "You know, I was never really one for aftermaths." The Doctor shut the doors and went for the console, dematerializing immediately. The two guards dove for the TARDIS, but it disappeared before either of them could reach it. The TARDIS was now safely wherever the hell it is when it's not immediately arriving somewhere else. * * * "Do you need any help getting the large pieces of glass out? Or perhaps a lot of painkiller?" Zinnia asked as the two hung about in the medical bay. "Nah, I'm good," Ellie replied. "Nanomachines, hon." "Oh, well that's a relief then!" Zinnia put away a giant syringe of painkiller. It was actually probably a giant novelty syringe or for someone from a planet of giants. There were very few situations where someone the size of Ellie would need that much pain killed. The Doctor came into the medbay. "So to recap, all of the emperor's doctors are going to jail for life, and we just jumped out of time to escape interrogation and study. Also the empire is in chaos, but that's nothing new. How is everyone, by the way?" "I'm fine. Ellie says she's fine. And you have a giant syringe for some reason?" Zinnia asked. "You'd be surprised how many medicines around the universe have multi-liter dosages," said the Doctor. "Should we help the surgeons out?" Ellie asked. "I mean. One of them is kinda guilty of massive levels of malpractice." "But the rest are only guilty of leaving the emperor alone with him," said the Doctor. "Don't most operations tend to involve a team of people? Like, nurses or surgical technicians or somebody? To hand scalpels and things?" Ellie asked. "Yeah, this hospital was just waiting to get hit with a malpractice suit," said Zinnia. "Not saying they deserve to die for it, but. I don't think we usually go rescue every grossly incompetent medical person in the universe," said Ellie. "It's life imprisonment, not death," the Doctor said. "I guess there's the argument that if it hadn't been for this, it would have been something else that got them in trouble for their terrible medical manner but I guess we are still responsible as a trigger," Zinnia said. "We could try to materialize in their holding cell and see what we can do. Or we can decide they've got what was coming to them eventually and commence with the doing of the runner," the Doctor suggested. "Assuming my piloting accuracy holds."